Being a Married College Student
By Amy Miller
I’m grateful that I was able to experience college being both single, and then married. In the beginning I was doing the college thing for the experience and learning, but finishing college as a married woman for the last few semesters was for more than that. I wasn’t just doing it for me anymore.
The Single College Life
People tend to think that it’s best to go through college being single, or at least not yet married. I think that’s true for some extent because it’s a time to find yourself, and take classes for you. It’s a time to explore your own interests both inside the classroom and outside. It’s a time to be in the real world with only a little, or sometimes no support from your parents. I’m very thankful I had parents who not only helped cover some of my college expenses, but also helped me find ways to be self-sufficient. These were important learning opportunities that I’m very glad I got to experience for half of my college career.
I’m so grateful for all of the 16 roommates I had over the past 7 years, who taught me a lot about myself and my goals. They prepared me for marriage in learning how to live with and get along with a different personality :) I have so many memories with them and will hold onto those forever. They were definitely a huge part of the fun in my college experience. However, I would still have to say the last 5 semesters I had being a married college student were my favorite :)
The married college life
Although the single college life gave me learning experiences, I’m more grateful that I got to be married to Trevor for the last half of college :) Not only did he make it possible for me to go back to school, but he changed me as a college student. I was more intentional in every class, every assignment, and every meeting with advisors and professors. I wasn’t doing college just for me anymore, I was doing it for my husband and our future children.
Having your spouse by your side during school means having another set of eyes to proof-read your papers. It’s having someone motivate you in doing an assignment you don’t want to do. It’s having someone give you ideas when you seem to be out of them. It’s having someone to vent to when you get frustrated over group projects (AM I RIGHT THOUGH?). It’s having encouragement from someone to be more proactive about what you need to do for your future. It’s having someone make you dinner because you have to turn in an assignment last minute. It’s also having another person’s talents benefiting you! For example, Trevor introduced me to better digital organizational skills for my notes and assignments and it changed my life :) People could say roommates can do all these things too, but let’s be honest - a spouse will be more consistently reliable :) A spouse is more invested in you and your success!
I was lucky enough not to work at the same time as going to school. Instead I just did a packed schedule every semester to get done quicker. I know that many others had a harder married college student experience in trying to find time for homework, in between working a part-time job (or sometimes full-time), while also trying to be a good spouse. Sometimes there’s even a baby thrown into the mix. It’s a hard balance, and I’m sure many assignments were sacrificed, or maybe a social life was sacrificed because you couldn’t do it all. I commend you! I’m sure you know all too well what it means to go to school for other reasons rather than just for yourself.
Whatever your circumstances may have been, be proud for where you are now, and be proud that you did it! Whatever your circumstances are now as a current married college student, be proud you are trying to make it work. Enjoy the time you get to spend with your spouse even though it may be little, and celebrate the small accomplishments you make throughout the semesters :) Take advantage of your spouse’s talents that might help you become a better student. And if you’re the spouse supporting the other going to school, make sure you truly support them! Encourage them in their career. Help them see and reach their full potential. I’m telling you, spouses can be the best cheerleaders! hahaha.
[caption id=“attachment_5079” align=“aligncenter” width=“589”] The moment you finally find your family in the audience, and see them waving and cheering for you :)[/caption]
What was your married college student experience like? Did you have different or similar circumstances? Feel free to share your experience!