Stars and Butterflies
By Amy Miller
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the way our blog is viewed. I wonder how our experiences are responded to. I wonder if we’re too bold in some of our marriage ideals. And sometimes I wonder if our life comes off as this airy fantasy of what marriage really is like. After I have written something, I think back at the reasons we established this blog and ask myself if the particular post can be beneficial to our readers. Sometimes I end up erasing the entire post, and other times I wish I could keep writing even further…
There are many topics I would like to expand on, because they are common occurrences in marriages, and I think we can all relate to them. Some of those subjects are arguments with your spouse, being a part of another family, and even more personal trials couples go through like depression, infertility, financial struggles, etc. We don’t talk about these subjects in depth because, we’ve been counseled by, well everyone, that it’s not good to discuss aspects of marital struggles outside of our marriage. Though I completely agree with that advice, some posts may not be fully understood because I’m leaving out a few of the details.
Just like you
You’ve been able to see the cute, silly, happy, and exciting parts of our marriage, or what a newlywed life is like. All of those posts are real. All of the feelings we describe having towards each other, and about the importance of marriage are real. All of the experiences and little moments we have are real. Nothing is fabricated to make it seem better than it really is. Because it truly is the best thing in the world to be married. But there are also real moments we have that aren’t so great, cute, happy, or fun. We disagree with each other. We have days that we are not on the same page. We go through trials that we don’t tell many people about. And sometimes we have moments where we feel like it’s us against the world. We may be in different circumstances in one way or another, but really, we’re just like you. Please know that though we don’t share these moments on our blog all of the time, it doesn’t mean we don’t have them. It doesn’t mean our life is only stars and butterflies and that nothing bad seems to happen to us. Life overall isn’t stars and butterflies, but there are many moments that are, and it’s OK to focus on those.
We share the happy moments because those are the moments that are worth sharing. Those are the moments that remind us that though we may have had an argument two days ago, we know we can be head over heals in love with each other today! We should all be reminded of our happy moments through difficult days. The point of our blog is to encourage marriages, and we feel that sharing the happy relate-able moments can do that.
I hope to find ways to share those more touchy subjects in a positive way, so that we can relate to each other more. But just know for right now, our marriage isn’t perfect, and neither is yours, but we love being married, and I’m sure you do too. Let’s continue relating to each other on that.