The Real 'Love Your Spouse' Challenge
By Amy Miller
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So I got nominated to do that ‘Love Your Spouse’ Challenge, but I’m not going to do it. It might be surprising since I’m a huge advocate of marriage, and that I totally admire this challenge going around! It’s important to publically share your feelings about your spouse, acknowledge their talents and how they have influenced your marriage, etc. But I think there can be TOO much of that sometimes. Especially when you’re like me - who has a blog focused on marriage so you’re usually talking about your marriage a lot, haha. But also, 7 days in a row of loving your spouse publically isn’t easy for everybody!
I read a blog post by a woman bashing the ’love your spouse’ challenge because it isn’t being realistic. Because not every day is stars and butterflies in marriage :) Not every fight is resolved by the time you go to bed. And with all of the photo captions of “He’s my best friend every day, and I love him more and more each day!” that started to seem farfetched in her mind.
I’ll be honest here too, there are some days that you look at your spouse after a conversation or situation and you think, “I don’t like who you are right now” or “You are frustrating me so much right now that I don’t want to be in the same room as you." So it’s hard to say they are your BFF every single day, or that they make you happier with every passing day…
My Thinking
Like we have said many times on here, we all like to put our best foot forward on social media. We don’t want to tell 500 facebook friends about all the arguments and frustrated inner thoughts we are having each week about our marriage! And we shouldn’t be doing that anyways! Maybe the photo captions we really want to read in this challenge are the not-so-good moments in marriage, but how they find love through it anyways …? That’s at least what I like to read! It helps keep it real and more relatable, right? So here’s my idea of keepin’ this challenge a little more real and fresh ;)
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‘Love Your Spouse’ Challenge[/caption]
It’s easy to love my spouse on the days when we cuddle, when is asking me “What can I do for you today?” and when he is patient with me for not showering for two days. :) But it’s not easy to love him when he tells me something I don’t want to hear, or when he loses patience with me. At the end of the day, though, I remember that these moments of being at odds with each other are just that – moments. Moments on our forever timeline that are tiny compared to all the days and weeks of selflessness and affection for one another.
I know why people say they love their spouse more and more each day; because love grows through the good times and the bad. You may not want to be near them on a given day, haha, but later that week you’ve found a new thing to adore them over. I love him more and more every day, even when I may not like him each day ;)