Wedding Rings: More Than a Piece of Jewelry
By Amy Miller
The day I was proposed to, the day I gave Trevor his wedding ring, and the day I got married to him were all days that showed me the meaning of a wedding ring. However, there was something else that happened this week where I realized the importance of a wedding ring again. And guess how it happened? While watching an episode of “Duck Dynasty” with my dad! hahaha. I’ll explain.
My dad and I think “Duck Dynasty” is a real hoot. Those rednecks are hilarious sometimes (mostly uncle Si). But there are other times I find myself getting annoyed with some of their ways of thinking, especially when it comes to marriage. Which brings me to the wedding ring situation in the episode: “Ring Around the Redneck.” Jase’s wife wants to get him a new wedding ring since he hasn’t been wearing one for years, so they go to a jewelry store and find him one. What bothers me is his attitude about the idea of a wedding ring. He doesn’t seem to care at all about what it means to his marriage for others to see he is committed to someone, or to his wife who wants others to know he is taken! He cares more about how it lessens his manhood by wearing jewelry, and that it will be an annoyance to his lifestyle. It doesn’t stop there because in this clip below, the men in his family and his coworkers razz him about succumbing to his wife’s wishes and getting a wedding ring. My annoyed thoughts on this are below the clip :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfrVPTP-1nM
Wear it proudly
I hate the “manhood” card, and they play it foolishly here. When people make fun of something lessening their manhood, it typically means “you should be ashamed about that in front of people.” If these guys (who are also married themselves by the way!) are saying that a wedding ring is something to be ashamed about then why are they still married?? How did they get married in the first place? hahaha. And how is a wedding ring a leash being held by their wife? Does that mean that all wives hold their husbands on leashes because they wear wedding rings? Excuse me, but my husband CHOSE to marry me! I’m not making him do anything; he WANTS to wear that ring proudly!
Shouldn’t you be excited to show people that you found someone you want to be with forever? Shouldn’t you show the respect your spouse deserves by wearing that symbol of commitment to them, AND doing it proudly? Sometimes we take off our rings for the night, or during a task and we forget to put it back on. However, I think that when you don’t wear your ring for a lengthy time and there aren’t legitimate reasons for doing so, it shows a lack of commitment to your spouse. Yeah, I just said that.
What a wedding ring means symbolically
The basics behind the symbolism of wedding rings/bands is that they first and foremost show a sign of commitment to their marriage. It’s something you exchange in your wedding ceremony where you just made promises to each other, so it also represents your willingness to uphold those promises made. The circle shape of course, signifies eternity, infinity, or forever. And with it typically being a valued precious metal, it is symbolic of how precious one’s spouse is to them. I think what it comes down to is that wearing a wedding ring shows love, devotion, acceptance, and commitment.
WHAT A WEDDING RING MEANS TO ME
I have definitely shared my opinions above of wedding rings and what they should mean to couples, and to the world. But now I will share what the wedding rings between my husband and I mean to me.
I told Trevor what I thought I wanted in a ring, and showed him pictures, we didn’t go to stores together. When I saw the ring for the first time I realized how much he nailed it on the head! He listened to my desires and even went extra miles to make it something I would cherish forever. This told me that my thoughts and my heart were a priority to him. It told me that he wanted me to be happy. And the specific inscription he had engraved on the inside of the ring told me he had been paying close attention from our very first date :)
I surprised Trevor with his ring while we were engaged and he absolutely loved it! I tricked him telling him it wouldn’t be ready for awhile so he was very pleasantly surprised :) We realized it was uncommon for him to wear a ring before the wedding day, but those BYU girls just couldn’t keep their eyes off of my man! For reals though, and Trevor didn’t tell me this until after I gave it to him, lol. He told me that he had been wanting to wear a ring badly because multiple girls had been full on flirting with him and he wanted them to know he was taken :) His excited and handsome face told me that he was relieved to have something to fight off those flirts :) And it told me that not only did he want to be fully committed to me, but he also was fully ready to be.
The Daily reminder
I am so grateful for my beautiful wedding ring! Not because it’s something to show off, but because it’s a constant daily reminder of my marriage. Every time I look at it, various thoughts come to mind and guess what? Each of those thoughts lead to other wonderful thoughts about my marriage! Like the following:
- “I’m so lucky.” —–> “I should text him and tell him that.”
- “I’m so in love with him!” ———-> “I should do something special for him today.”
- “He bought this for me with his hard-earned money, wow.” ———> “And he continues to be a hard worker for me and for us! I’m so grateful for that security.”
- “I am committed to him and this marriage.” ——> “Have I asked him what I can do for him today?”
I never thought wedding rings would seem so unusual in our American culture. Even in many other cultures they use some sort of ring to symbolize marriage. It’s been going on for hundreds and hundreds of years! Though it annoyed me so much watching them disrespect wedding rings and their wives (because they did!), it gave me the chance to truly think about what a wedding ring means to me, and what it should mean to all of us.
If you have lost your wedding ring and have yet to replace it, I suggest you get on that sooner rather than later! I don’t think affordability should be an excuse because you can always buy a $25 fake diamond ring online as a placeholder. I hope that when you look at your wedding ring, you see it as more than a piece of jewelry. I hope you see it as a daily reminder of appreciating your marriage, and committing to work at keeping it wonderful!